Hope Mangiafico (00:00)
In this episode, you'll see why Jesus causes us to be like little children and how that childlikeness or childhood can free your adult heart starting today. Hi, I'm Hope.
Nikki Humphrey (00:13)
Hi, I'm Nikki. Welcome to Equipped Fellowship, where friends become family through Christ. We're two Jesus Loving Friends on a mission to share personal stories, resources, and real talk about our triumphs, breakthroughs, struggles, and setbacks. Why? Because we believe you are called to live victoriously, and we're here to equip you with Holy Spirit-led tools and strategies to strengthen your faith,
Hope Mangiafico (00:26)
you
.
Nikki Humphrey (00:42)
Transform your mindset and walk boldly in God's promises. Because here's the truth, you have been given great and precious promises by God. So grab your coffee, lean in and let's grow together. It's time to step into everything God has for you.
Hope Mangiafico (01:02)
Amen. And we are going to learn today that to receive all that God has for us, we got to be like children. Ain't that the truth? And I'm excited and I love this concept because we're all, most of the people listening to this, unless there's a kid in the back seat while you're driving, we're all adults here. We all are kind of have those years behind us and trying to wrap our minds around like how do we be like children despite the fact we know in scripture there's
Nikki Humphrey (01:11)
That's all right.
Hope Mangiafico (01:31)
conversations, Jesus teaching about children. How do we do it, right? So, I'm excited for that. And, you know, it's like how do you even do that as an adult? So, we're not necessarily talking about how that little child you know, maybe it was your own child, running into a parent's arms without overthinking or the kid crying loudly and then laughing five minutes later or that constant, why, why, why, why? We're not really talking about us.
demonstrating that externally, like a little child would to their loving parent. But we're discussing that in regard to us asking the father why. Laughing and crying and emoting with the father and running straight to him when there's problems. That's what we're discussing today is our childhood to our heavenly father. And the reason it's kind of hard for us to wrap our minds around is somewhere along the way most of us stopped actually living like this.
of course externally, but also just like internally being vulnerable and connecting with the father. And we became careful, guarded, strategic about our every move. I've paid for strategies. ⁓ We manage our image, we manage our emotions. And if you think about it, we often struggle with control.
And so we try to manage God or better yet to be God to replace him. And that's a hard reality that I know that I can say, yes, I've done that. And so we have as adults learned to stuff, numb, over control our emotions often just to survive. But Jesus says something really shocking. He says, I've already planted the seed for this.
The way into his kingdom, his father's kingdom, is to become like a little child. And that's not just about faith, childlike faith. It's also about how we feel, how we cry, and my favorite part of this, how we hope again. Children are filled with hope. And we think it's them just being naive. But what if it's so much more than that? I think we're gonna uncover that today. So.
Today, we don't want you to just understand childlikeness and how you've seen it in children around you. We want you to feel how beautiful it is and see how it can actually free your heart and your emotions as an adult today, starting right now. So, Nikki, kick it off my friend of seeing how Jesus treated children and how he wants to treat that child that's still in you.
Nikki Humphrey (04:19)
So the first chunk that we're dealing with today happens in Matthew 19 and Mark 10. So picture this, the disciples have been rolling with Jesus for a little bit now and they've been doing all these really awesome things to people that they can't even wrap their mind around, but they're seeing all these awesome miracles and healings and transformations and teachings from Jesus. But what they see right now is so out of
the ordinary and so out of like what they thought their recipe for ministering, being disciples of Jesus was. In this scene, there are parents bringing their children to Jesus so he can bless them. So imagine like all these people, like this is the Disney world of its day. Like parents are bringing their kids to see Jesus. And we
Hope Mangiafico (04:57)
Hmm. Hmm.
Nikki Humphrey (05:15)
know
Some of those kids probably want to be there. Some of them don't. They are running around. They're acting crazy. Some are probably being reprimanded. Some are probably just excited. Some, you know, are just pushing each other. It's probably a scene unlike anything that they've ever dealt with before. And to the disciples, children are interruptions and distractions, and they're not important enough
to take this time away from Jesus and his bigger ministry, his bigger plans, his kingdom building things, right? And Jesus is, I can't even say it, I'm so excited. But Jesus notices and scripture says he becomes indignant. Like there are,
Hope Mangiafico (05:47)
Relatable.
Hmm.
Nikki Humphrey (06:15)
few
times in the Bible where Jesus becomes indignant. And so that causes us to take pause and be like, OK, listen up, because he's going to have some golden nuggets that's coming next. So he calls the children to him and says, let the little children come to me and do not hinder them. Like, yes, come, come forth. I love all of this. I love.
Hope Mangiafico (06:19)
Hmm.
All right. Okay.
Nikki Humphrey (06:44)
the rambunctiousness. I love the energy. I love that you just want to come to me. And then he lays his hands and blesses them. Notice his emotional
posture. He isn't irritated by their noise. He isn't impatient with their neediness. He isn't overwhelmed by this energy. He protects their access to him. And I love that.
Hope Mangiafico (07:08)
Mm.
Nikki Humphrey (07:12)
We all have access to Jesus and I think we forget that. And as I was reading through this and preparing through this, I could almost pinpoint the exact moment in time. I'm getting emotional.
that I lost access to Jesus or I felt that it was blocked. There was a time when little Nikki was just a happy little joy bomb. Like I remember singing and dancing and twirling around the house and being creative and wanting to perform. And there was this one day, this one encounter with one of my parents.
when I realized that was not okay. It was not okay to be me. It was not okay to do what I was doing that was not good and that was not acceptable in my house. And that moment broke me. And I wasn't even that old. I probably was like five or six. I can remember what I was wearing. I can remember what I was doing.
Hope Mangiafico (08:01)
Hmm.
Nikki Humphrey (08:30)
And in that moment that I was broken, I was believing that I needed to change who I was to fit in and be loved by anyone, even God. So when Jesus hearing this story, he was protecting the access to the child. He didn't care about what they were doing, whether they're joy bombs or misbehaving or whatever. He was like, come to me.
And realizing this, a lot of people are walking around with probably these spiritual brokenness wounds where they feel like access to God, Jesus and Holy Spirit was taken away. And that's how we're approaching God.
Hope Mangiafico (09:18)
Hmm.
Nikki Humphrey (09:19)
with this broken lens that don't be too much, don't be too needy, get
it together, fix this, do that before you can have access to not only Jesus, God, but just people in general. We always feel like we gotta change, we gotta conform. And God in this story, Jesus just wants them to come just as they are.
Hope Mangiafico (09:31)
Okay.
Nikki Humphrey (09:49)
uninhibited coming forth to
him. So we come to God after we're calmed down, we try to clean our lives up. And sometimes after we edit our inner circle, it's like almost like a checklist, which we've talked about in the last episode, like, in order to do this, to gain access to gain this to be forgiven, I need to do all these things. And that is not
Hope Mangiafico (09:56)
you Okay.
Nikki Humphrey (10:19)
what God is expecting from us at all.
He just wants us to come as we are. But Jesus insists through this scripture that messy, emotional, and noisy children can run straight into his arms. You have unedited emotions. You and I, everyone listening, everyone watching,
that are not a problem for Jesus.
Your fear, your confusion, your joy, your disappointments, he welcomes it all.
So embracing your child likeness means you don't have to fix yourself before coming to God. You bring yourself to Him like a child running to a safe parent. And Jesus doesn't want to just welcome children. He tells adults that we actually have to become just like them.
Hope Mangiafico (11:25)
Hmm.
which is incredible because we see him doing that to his disciples even further with that encouragement to become just like them. I, before we go into the next scripture, I loved this first little tiny story because it was so small, right, but so powerful that in Mark when it tells the story that Nikki just shared, it actually states that Jesus took them in his arms. So everything Nikki shared,
It demonstrates that, but like it wasn't just words. wasn't just, he was kind of conveying that, I love him. It's like, come on in, let me take you and like pick you up, bring you into my arms and hold you, be that safety net, however you are. And I love that image that Mark included when he told this story. Cause I just saw like just a big easy swoop up and a little, you know, swaying side to side. So that was exciting.
Now, we are to become like children and, you know, Jesus even now with me, I would assume that he'd be able to pick me up and take care of me if he was right here, right now in the natural. But he definitely could do that for a little hope. And what we're going to do is we're actually going to read, or the scripture we're referencing is Matthew 18, one through six. We're not going to read it, but it's in Matthew 18. And the context.
are the disciples. The good old 12. And don't worry guys, we're gonna be diving into the disciples, which I'm looking forward to down the road of just like, Lord, you pick some crazy banana folk. They are insane. So these disciples, they're just trying along and they're having this great question of like, who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?
And you know, it's fair. Nikki pointed out in the previous story, like they've been rolling with Jesus for a while. They've been watching all these miracles and stuff. And Nikki already shared the story of like, wow, that was crazy. Like people are bringing children. That seems out of the ordinary. So now they're like, who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven? And Jesus simply calls little children to stand among them.
And so the first story Nikki shares, the parents are bringing their children to be blessed by Jesus. And this one, Jesus is calling these children to be in the middle of these grown adults. I'm just like picturing myself as that child. And be like, what is going on? Right? It's crazy. And so this child is standing in the middle of these grown men who are obsessed with status.
So you could think, okay, maybe the disciples are wanting to know this question because they authentically want to know how does this kingdom work? That's a possibility. But we also know they're adults that are part of the fall that have some pride and they want to know how can I be the best disciple? How can I climb the ranks for lack of a better term? And when you have a child in the center who has no qualifications,
Nikki Humphrey (14:25)
Thanks.
Hope Mangiafico (14:42)
No achievement whatsoever. And this is what I love as I picture a child standing among all these grown adults. They're just there and willing.
That is what it means to be like a child. And what I love it's also being obedient to the calling when I hear my name.
because that's what children do. No matter where you are in your home as a child, if you can remember a time, you hear your name, you're skedaddling down the stairs in the other room from outside, you're coming.
what this child did that Jesus placed in the middle of these disciples. And Jesus said a few key statements here. Unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. And I remember I used to read the scripture and I would kind of be offended by it. Hence, disciple mentality, right? Like I'm an adult, how can I not be good enough?
What else can I do on that checklist like Nikki had mentioned and we've mentioned a million times on the podcast? But when I put my child hat on instead of my adult hat it actually shows the simplicity and being a child of God if we will simply just let it be.
Like the fact that we have to be that simplistic to inherit any of the gifts that he has is this beautiful thing. But as soon as we step outside of that simplicity of the mindset of a child, when we approach our Father, our Savior, and let the Holy Spirit guide us, we can't reach any of it. That's actually mind blowing to our adult minds. That's why it's the upside down kingdom, right?
And the other statement was, whoever humbles himself like the child is the greatest. So Jesus actually answers the question of these prideful men pursuing the things of the flesh. And he says, it's humility, just like this child that just came when I called his name. That is the greatest. Obedience is the greatest. And we can obey the more we get to know our father, because we know he's good.
He only brings good gifts. He only offers great things. His kingdom is full of just that, the precious gifts, as we say in every single intro.
And that is how we take part, is humility and being okay with acting and being like a child. So there are a few things that you can lean into to kind of put on this child ship. I know that's a made up word. We've kind of ran with it over the past, I don't know, I don't know how long ago we started using that word, but it's been a while, but I like it because it feels like.
position in life, know, champion, championship. I just want a child ship instead of winning a championship. And so one of the traits that can help you lean into the freedom of being like a child is having dependence. The reason a child will come when their name is called is because they're dependent on what a parent tells them. They don't have the ability to just go off and
go purchase something or, you know, go across town, hop on the bus. Like, they are limited to what they can do. They depend on their parent. And dependence also is really important because as adults, we like to pretend that we are self-sufficient.
And that's a lie. We can't be self-sufficient. So to become like a child, you become dependent. one of those dependent statements that a child would make to their father is like, I need help. Sounds so simple. But how often do we not ask for help from our father? And then saying, I can't do this alone. Ha! Which...
Your girl has tried to do so much alone.
because my adult distortion is I definitely shouldn't need help, especially from God. I should be able to because I know all these things about the qualities of God and how he's made me. I should just be able to buckle up and do it. Or I must hold it all together because people are counting on me, right? And I can't need anybody. And a lot of us develop.
especially that last statement is, can't need anybody because we've been hurt. It's kind of like Nikki sharing her story before about she remembers the exact moment when the joy was taken away from her when she was a child. That starts that snowball effect of thinking you can't need anyone because no one's trustworthy. You've been hurt, you've been rejected. It's an ugly spiral that's going to happen in life.
often starting at a younger age because it's life. People are imperfect.
You have to say, don't want these adult distortions anymore. And the reason we continue to have those distortions until we hear the good news of how to finally be a child is we see ourselves through the broken lens of life instead of our identity as a child of God. It's that simple. I've seen myself through brokenness even as recent as yesterday or when something shows up. If I'm not careful.
I will let that distorted lens of hope's body is broken, hope's brain is broken, her thoughts are broken, instead of I have the mind of Christ. He's given me sound mind and love and power, like it's a retraining of renewing as Roman says of the mind. So with that dependence, it makes it safe for you to just be like, hey, I'm not okay right now and just sit there.
with the father. And it lets you admit the overwhelm, anxiety, or sadness instead of faking the strength, which I know Nikki, you can attest to this just like I can. Instead of faking, we have this safety now where we know we can do it. And that's really nice. So you got the dependence, you got the trust, and that safety opens the door to finally like, okay, I can trust.
And maybe some of these kids, like in the story that I shared, in Matthew 18, one through six, this child, he probably had witnessed things that Jesus did. So that safety was already there. That trust was already there, which is also a really cool thought when you think about it. And so now we become children by trusting and taking Jesus at his word like this child did. And...
this child believed Jesus' word and character. And we don't have to have these distortions we carry with us of we have to control the outcomes because this is so, so true about my own journey, because no one will really take care of me. I'm still battling that. I have released a lot to my trustworthy father, my heavenly father, but that mentality is very deep in me.
that no one will take care of me. And if they act like they are, at any moment, it might just come out, pull it out from under me kind of thing. ⁓ So that is my personal distortion. I know many of us have that control factor in our lives.
The third one is just being open and honest. So children say what they feel, if they're scared, they just say it. If they're excited, you know it. They're expressive. It's so cute. We think it's cute with them, but what about us? Right? Like, we are just children in bigger bodies. Maybe that will help us reframe this, right? Like, we're just children in bigger bodies because we're God's children. We never outgrow that. And I think...
We think it's because they don't know how to communicate. But what if it's the simplicity of if there's a need, you just express it. Let's take away the adult distortion of, they just don't know what they're doing and maybe simplify it for us and say, hey, if there's a need, just express it however you can. And it's that simple.
And by doing that, you get that permission to be emotionally honest with God. And you're just allowed to say, like, I'm disappointed. I don't understand. Like, you just let it roll out. And the thing that we know, but I just have to drill it in, that there is no reason to withhold because he already knows you so intimately already. And even in
in the process of you being closed off. He's like, I see it. Nicky and I have talked about this on the podcast before. He sees it. Express it. Let it out. It's gonna heal you when you let it out. And it's actually for your benefit.
Just like when a child expresses outwardly, they benefit from that expression. And so it's freeing. So that's us as adults becoming like children. And that's not the only example where he uses a child for the disciples. So there's yet another moment where he places a child right in the middle of an argument.
Nikki Humphrey (24:27)
So this one comes from Mark 9. The disciples are arguing again about greatness.
Hope Mangiafico (24:35)
You
Nikki Humphrey (24:35)
these guys. ⁓
Hope Mangiafico (24:38)
Can't be happy, can they?
Nikki Humphrey (24:40)
So relatable, like you said earlier, like we're going to dive into the disciples, but it's so relatable. Like I used to get together with my girls and just like, you argue about these stupid things that come up and it's just like, the disciples are no different than we were. There was nothing inherently, we all have special and great gifts from God, right? But there is nothing like so unique that that would make them
Hope Mangiafico (24:54)
Thank you.
Nikki Humphrey (25:10)
above arguing about greatness. But yet again, Jesus places a child among them and says, whoever receives one such child in my name, receives me. Jesus identifies himself with smallness, with vulnerability, with need. And many of us reject that part.
Hope Mangiafico (25:11)
Mm. Okay.
Nikki Humphrey (25:40)
of ourselves. We silence it. We tell it to grow up. Like Hope just said, we can do it all by ourselves. We don't need anybody. But Jesus says, if you want to receive me, welcome that small, tender
Hope Mangiafico (25:41)
Hmm.
Nikki Humphrey (25:58)
part of your heart and bring it to me. Like Hope again just said about that openness and sharing.
Every person still carries inside of them what we call the childlike part of their heart. And that part feels deeply, longs for safety and desire to be known. We
Hope Mangiafico (26:26)
Thank you.
Nikki Humphrey (26:28)
are born with those things in our heart. No matter from a teeny tiny baby through infancy, toddler, teenage years throughout, it's
there, but sometimes we just shut it off.
through messages, sometimes when we're little, like, stop crying, be strong, don't be sensitive, grow up. And we hear those things over and over. And just like the story I shared at the beginning, those things that were so inherent part of our identity, we just start to push them down, to become guarded, to be cautious, to act one way in front of one person and another way around another person.
What Jesus is teaching is that rejecting our smallness, those things about us that God created in us can actually block intimacy with him. Because intimacy with God requires honesty and openness, like Hope just talked about. When Jesus tells us to receive the child, he's also inviting us to receive the tender parts of our own heart.
Those parts may include grief, fear, longing, joy, hope, vulnerability. Instead of silencing those places, bring it to Him. And that's where healing begins. Healing can never begin when you shut those parts off from yourself, when you shut them off from God, when you're not honest with yourself, when you're not communicating those things.
for others, you're just putting on a mask, shoving it down, and you're no longer being your true authentic self, but you're playing a role, like your actor portrayal of yourself. Because God does not heal the parts of us that we pretend don't exist. He can't heal it unless we bring it to him. He heals the parts when we bring them into his presence. At its core,
Hope Mangiafico (28:14)
Okay.
Nikki Humphrey (28:37)
This teaching reminds us that our relationship with God is not meant to be built on performance. It's meant to be built on belonging. Children don't earn their place in a family. They live from it. Jesus is showing that the kingdom of God works the same way. We receive him not by proving ourselves, but by coming to him honestly, humbly,
Hope Mangiafico (28:52)
Okay. Okay.
Nikki Humphrey (29:06)
and openly.
Hope Mangiafico (29:07)
Yes, so good. And as a side note to complement what you're sharing, if you pause and just think about everything Nikki just shared in this little like stacking we're doing of stories, these all boil down to exactly the character of Jesus. I wrote down as just a note that Isaiah 53 2 talks about that Jesus came with no beauty or majesty.
We wouldn't even have desired him. And these are the traits that made him so wonderful and approachable though. And I just asked myself the question of don't we want to be like him? We have these images that he was so grandiose and we think that we have to be grandiose and do all these things. But scripture literally says we wouldn't even desire him. Just like we're not desiring to be childlike. We need to pause.
Do you want to be like Jesus? Because if so, then you also become like a child. I just wanted to share that because it's something we forget about because we know the comfort of Jesus because we're not in His presence. The disciples were in His presence. They knew what He looked like. We have no clue. We see paintings and who knows? They're probably wrong based off what Isaiah 53.2 says.
So just remember that when you start resisting, becoming like a child and embracing that smallness and everything that you've been pushing down, be like, wait, if I'm a follower of Jesus, I need to let it out to be like him. I think that's really cool.
Nikki Humphrey (30:42)
you are talking hope was just downloaded to me. We love how, or I love how kids are just so naturally curious, right? They lead with curiosity always. And like you said, way at the beginning, they're always asking like, why, why, why? And all of that. And just reminded me that oftentimes when Jesus encountered people, he led with curiosity and not condemnation.
Hope Mangiafico (30:52)
Yeah.
Amen. So true.
Nikki Humphrey (31:09)
And that's a good reminder for all of us. Instead of just instantly condemning people or judging them, be like Jesus, like Hope just said, lead with curiosity, not condemnation. And that will open up a doorway to get to know somebody on a heart level and not just on an earthly thought level.
Hope Mangiafico (31:32)
And it would be at a heart level because if you move with curiosity, it's actually because you care about the person and God is love. So that would actually be an overflow of his love. So that's why curiosity carries so much weight and can go to that heart level is he's love. Curiosity is love.
because you actually care about that person.
there is such beauty of being Todd-like. So, we've kind of hit it, hit it a little bit in each story. There are a couple of shifts that happen and I would call them beautiful shifts that are tied with freedom for you as an individual. So, the first shift, and we've talked about this a million times, from performance to presence. That's that pausing. That's that like
soaking it all up kind of thing. So as adults, we often perform emotionally and I feel this to my core. We try to have the right feelings, the right level of faith, the right testimony. Gosh, we've all been there. And this was a big one for me because and I actually, guess I really never thought about it in performance until going through this. The father has been teaching me for a while now.
that for years I needed to stop seeing things as right or wrong. I loved the right or wrong little spectrum. It's not a spectrum, the black and white are right or wrong. But rather for me to just be with him.
⁓ and it's like how does just being translate to right and wrong? And basically he's saying, hope you're getting caught up in the stuff that doesn't matter. As soon as you're with me and present with me, you're gonna understand what's right for you. There is no one right thing. Legitimately, there is not. I've been, I've been on this track for years, like literally at least three, and he still has to tell me just be.
which is often conveyed to me as breathe hope, because I'm getting caught up in what is the right thing to do, right? Is this the right thing to say, the right story, the right feeling, especially the right level of faith? ⁓ When you deal with ailments, shoot, ⁓ I know Nikki and I have eons of stories that we could tell about this. We've been taught this by accident, people unaware that we don't have enough faith for the healing.
That's not our father saying that at all. It's just a misuse of scripture. So we want to get rid of that performance based mentality and be like the children where they are just right there where they are amongst the adults, hearing their name and running, embracing, asking all the whys. We want to be that. And we want to cry when we're sad, laugh when we're happy and express outwardly.
to our father, who is the parent. Because as soon as we express, I'm hearing he knows it, but as soon as we express, that's permission for him to move. A parent can't move until the child expresses outwardly because the parent can't read the mind. You may know your daughter well, Nikki, but you can't read her mind, especially at her age. So there has to be an outward expression for permission.
And the beauty and freedom is that he prefers your real tears over your fake composure. And this frees you from the pressure to feel strong or to be faith-filled all the time. Because have you tried to force faith? It don't work because it's life. There's ebbs and flows. We don't have to be on the mountaintop all the time. We're not called to be on the mountaintop all the time.
So let it rip tater chip to your father. So shift one, performance to present. Shift two, from control to trust, which as adults we're white knuckling our way through life. If you think about it, how many times have you white knuckled to try to manage your emotions? Don't feel that, don't think that, push it down. Nikki's already given those ⁓ examples. But children, they feel, they express, and they move through it. Here's the catch.
with parental guidance. We get stuck in our emotions because we don't go to our parent, our heavenly father, for the guidance on how to move through it. But a child runs to the parent, and the parent helps walk them through that processing.
⁓ Let it go and trust them. And release the illusion that you're holding the world together.
Please. It's an illusion. It looks like a sweater. But if you pull the one string, the whole thing unravels. Just release it and know that you're not responsible to fix your heart.
Here's your responsibility as you go from control to trust. You are responsible to bring your heart to him. And that is freeing. And no more seeing yourself as one massive broken project.
I've viewed myself for a long time. I'm never good enough, so I'm climbing climbing climbing climbing climbing because I'm so broken. No, we're releasing that. That's trying to control where we're headed. We get to trust. And shift three is from self-protection to honest vulnerability and we have talked about self-protection many times on this episode. We build walls as adults. We protect ourselves from more disappointment, more hurt, and we're appearing strong.
But children, they're unguarded. They let it rip, as I said before. Let it rip, tater chip. ⁓ And when they're hurt, they run to the ones they trust. When they're joyful, they share it. Some of this is repetitive, but we have to drill this message because we're no longer acting like children. So it is repetitive. And we need to hear it a million times. And the beauty of that is the freedom to be seen in your real state without.
fear of rejection, which boy have we all had that. it allows God to meet you where you actually are. As Nikki said, not where you pretend to be. Woo! So that big takeaway is child-likeness is not emotional chaos. We think they don't know what they're doing when they're crying and they're laughing and they're here and there, all over the place. Guess what? So am I. I just don't show outwardly.
So it's not emotional chaos when you act like a child. It's actually emotional safety. It's a heart that knows it's allowed to feel and be held at the same time. And dare I say, it's simply knowing in your heart that you are safe to be at rest finally in your father's hand.
Hmm
Nikki Humphrey (38:42)
⁓ good.
Now, this one is speaking to me.
Why we resist being childlike. And a lot of that is what Hope just said, that we think that childlikeness is emotional chaos, but it's not. It's not.
So some of the top reasons why we resist being childlikeness is if I let myself feel I may fall apart, I'm the queen of this. This is just too much. I'm gonna put it in a box. Happen. If you all knew the types of things that I have been through in my life, and these, I mean, this is pure.
Hope Mangiafico (39:14)
Mmm.
Nikki Humphrey (39:30)
drama and I didn't even react.
I didn't cry, I didn't scream, I didn't do anything. I just boop. Because I couldn't let myself feel, or I used to think that I couldn't let myself feel because if I did, it would not only let that thing out that I was immediately shoving down, it would bring out everything that I had been shoving down for 40 years plus.
Hope Mangiafico (39:35)
Okay. Okay.
Nikki Humphrey (40:02)
But we have to, we have to process the feelings as we come up. We've talked about feelings, emotions, all those things time after time again, because you know what? You might cry, you might feel deeply, but you're not falling apart alone in a void. Fall into the arms of a father who can hold you. Just like when Jesus brought those little kids to him and he embraced each and every one of you.
Hope Mangiafico (40:13)
Okay.
Nikki Humphrey (40:32)
He wants you to fall into his arms and get the supreme comfort only that God can give you. So don't think about in those wounded patterns from the past, process those feelings, process those emotions, process those things that happen in life as soon as you can with your father. Another one is,
Hope Mangiafico (40:40)
Hmm.
Nikki Humphrey (41:00)
I was punished or shamed for my emotions when growing up. I know I was. I know we weren't allowed to show emotion, to process them, to talk about emotions.
That was a big no-no. And to talk about emotions with people outside of the family, you better not be doing that either. But a reframe would be like history trained you to hide, but it did not change God's nature. Not one little bit. Jesus never rebukes children for crying or laughing. He protects their access to Him.
Hope Mangiafico (41:16)
Thank you. .
Nikki Humphrey (41:42)
Do not be afraid
to again, show your emotions, process them. Don't put them in a box.
see what they're about is what they're about. And like we've talked about in episodes of that, what's the root? What is bringing that thing up?
Hope Mangiafico (41:56)
Yeah.
Nikki Humphrey (42:02)
And for me, only time with God the Father exposes those roots. My own digging and my own searching and my own trying to connect the dots, it always
leads me into the curly Q's.
but asking God what is the root of this emotion that's coming up again and again and again, only he can break that cycle.
And then the next one, so you start letting yourself feel, you start emoting a little bit. And then this third one, you don't trust your emotions. Like, cause when you first start feeling emotions, you're like, what is that? Cause you blocked it so long, your mind, body and spirit have disconnected from that emotion.
Hope Mangiafico (42:45)
Yeah.
Nikki Humphrey (42:49)
So that rewiring process
can cause you to not trust what is coming up or like, am I overreacting? Am I underreacting? Is this okay? But childlikeness is not letting your emotions rule you. It's letting God into them. Like I just said before, you bring them to him instead of being ruled by them or shutting them down.
Hope Mangiafico (43:14)
Whew, it's a big one.
Nikki Humphrey (43:17)
And these are all connected, but they all have one thing in common. You have to go to your father to figure this out. You have to run to him and be curious, like we were leading with curiousness and not condemnation. Don't condemn yourself for having those feelings. Run to God the Father and be curious with him about why these things are coming up and how they're coming up.
Hope Mangiafico (43:24)
Yeah.
Nikki Humphrey (43:42)
And then the last one I had down here, it says, it feels weak or embarrassing to be that open. Yep, I've been there.
But when God takes away the shame of a situation, an event, a circumstance, a thought,
there's no embarrassment anymore. Because you're not hiding in the secret box of shame. You're not trying to hide. You're no longer trying to protect everything, pretend everything's perfect. That's when the embarrassment creeps in.
The reframe is the kingdom is upside down. What looks weak is often where grace flows the most. Emotional honesty is not immaturity, hiding it is.
Hope Mangiafico (44:27)
Woo, a great lesson.
Nikki Humphrey (44:29)
So if your heart is saying, want this, but I don't know how to start, let's get really simple and practical here.
Hope Mangiafico (44:32)
my gosh.
Amen. Let's turn off our adult brains and not call this irresponsible. Okay guys? The first one and this is hard for some based on how you were raised in your household with, you know, formalities is go approach the Father with an unedited prayer. So you just take five or ten minutes alone.
and you tell your heavenly father what you're actually feeling. Not the, come before you father and I am asking for faith. I just, know, faith like a machine. No, no, no, no, no, no, It's holy cannoli. I don't know what to do right now, father. I feel defeated. You know, be as honest as you feel that you can and then go deeper.
Every time you feel like you hit a wall, you gotta keep going deeper because He knows the depths of you. So if you keep going, He's gonna take you deeper and deeper in that unedited prayer. So you tell Him how you're feeling, whether it's angry, numb, scared, hopeful, that's always good, confused. And you can even say like, don't understand why this is happening. There's so many things we don't get, so many things we may never get. But the only way you're gonna understand it is going to your Father.
freely. And let them know if you're afraid. That's one I think we often don't share and we suppress because we, again, unknowns. Tell your father. And speaking of fear, I just feel very compelled to share this with Nikki, what she shared about obstacles and about people hurting you and being afraid maybe to even open up to the father. Jesus is not the one that hurt you.
And that can be a process to actually learn and to gain that trust and to give the trust over, I should say, back to Jesus. But much to what Nikki also said, which was that history trained you to hide, but it did not change God's nature.
He is a good Father. Jesus is a good Savior. Holy Spirit is an amazing guide. That's where power, love, and a sound mind comes from. It's a list of three for the reason that it's actually an attribute of each one of them. He did not hurt you. And know that when you come forward today and you do an unedited prayer. And let him know if you're afraid because you're afraid he's gonna hurt you.
but I wanted to encourage you and tell you it was not him.
And when you go into this unedited prayer, practice by picturing yourself as a small child climbing into his lap with this, just like in the first story Nikki shared where in Mark it talks about Jesus taking the kids into his arms. See yourself.
climbing into that massive lap of a heavenly father, which is huge because he's got enough room for you. And there's no cleaning it up first. Just be honest. You don't need to impress them. No religious language needed. OK, I started that way by saying holy cannoli. Just go with it. So unedited prayer and then
Ask with a child-likeness for your daily needs. So, for example, this is one that I hear often from people is they feel like what they need is too small. God's too busy. A child will ask the parent for a penny, for $500. They have no concept of size, okay? For their sock, for their underwear, for a new car, because they don't know what that is. Like, there's nothing too small.
He cares about it all, so go to him.
Be brave enough, courageous enough to ask for the small things. And then for some emotional help too. If you're struggling with that safety that we've talked about, ask him to help you feel safe with him again. Help you cry if you've been stuffing for so long like Nikki didn't have responses to trauma. Just ask.
to help get it out, to shed one little tear. That's a real thing. And to help soften your heart if it feels hard.
and third one is to notice and receive. So this is a really big one too. After you've done an unedited prayer and you're asking for these small things, asking them for help for all these things, pay attention to the small things and moments in your life, whether it's actually like things or it's small moments of comfort, peace, joy, being seen by someone. And don't just brush it off.
Thank your heavenly father, because that means he heard you and he's showing you, I hear you my child. This is not a coincidence or an accident that it's happening. So do not brush it off and be sure to pay attention. He is a good father and this preps your heart to receive his goodness and not see him as a distant father anymore. And the last one.
is to have one playful moment with God. We're not telling you to all the day be dancing or crying. It's for a moment. Do something small and playful. Sit in the sun, draw, sing, dance, walk slowly, not in a hurry. That's actually playful in today's day and age, especially as adults. Let yourself enjoy it with Him. And when guilt or thoughts like, is silly.
show up, say, I'm allowed to be your child right now. It's like what he's been teaching me about asking what would a daughter do. When I have that guilt or questioning come up, I always say what would a daughter do? It's like the daughter would be having fun, dancing, being free. And these are just some ideas.
The good news is you have the rest of your life to be a child to your father. We are not telling you to do all of them. Take one. The unedited prayer, asking for a small thing, noticing what you're asking for, a playful moment, just do one. And you can try another one the next day.
And that's all I have. You want to close this out, Nikki?
Nikki Humphrey (51:06)
Yes. So today I want to close everybody out with prayer. If you felt that longing, that ache, if I want my heart to be soft again, like a child, I want to feel safe to be myself with God again, this prayer is for you. Father, I've tried to be strong, put together for so long. I've controlled my emotions, hidden my needs,
Hope Mangiafico (51:26)
Hmm.
Nikki Humphrey (51:35)
and sometimes even hidden from you. Today, I hear you inviting me to be your child again. I say yes, make my heart childlike. Teach me to bring my feelings to you. Teach me to trust you with my weaknesses, my tears, my joy, my confusion. I lay down my knee to impress you and I receive being your
beloved child. Show me this week how to come to you like a little one again. Amen.
Hope Mangiafico (52:19)
Anytime this week, something comes up, pause and remember what Jesus said. Let the little children come to me.
and that you're not too much for him, he welcomes you with open arms. Until next time, we'll see you in the overflow.
