Hope Mangiafico (00:00)
That was good. That was good.
Nikki Humphrey (00:02)
Yeah.
I mean, my dad made an appearance on the episode. He didn't even know it.
Hope Mangiafico (00:10)
That was funny. Yeah. you know, we talked about in our last episode how we had all these interruptions. We were talking about how to love like God and they were really felt like honestly attacks. This one didn't necessarily feel like attacks, but it felt like interferences for sure. I told Nikki in this episode that like we have a couple different trash companies that come to our neighborhood. On my street, these handful of homes, none of us use the one that comes on these days, okay, that comes on a Tuesday.
a homeboy in his big old dumpster truck pulling a yewie right in front of his window right here. And I mean, you're hearing all the beeps, all the things for felt like an eternity, but praise the Lord, it was not because we're not in eternity yet. But it felt so long and you're sitting there talking and, you know, saying so many great pieces from the Lord.
Nikki Humphrey (01:04)
And then my dad, I'm like, you can come anytime to drop off your dog dad, except between one and two.
130 rolls along.
Hope Mangiafico (01:22)
Maybe he thought it was between one and two, so he averaged them together. That's funny. I didn't know that. Man, and it's one of those things that I think listeners could attest to this too. Like when you're like in a flow and really going in alignment with the Lord and you get an interruption, it shakes your whole being of like, crap, like how do I pick this back up?
Nikki Humphrey (01:48)
Right, because you have like, sometimes the Holy Spirit just takes over. And I think I was kind of in that spot where I was just like, and then I'm like, it's okay, we can edit, like, Hope's really good at that. And then you try to pick it back up and you're like, Holy Spirit, you're supposed to be my community right now. And I'm feeling alone.
Hope Mangiafico (01:54)
You were.
I'm thinking about the Holy Spirit being community and I'm thinking, I'm complaining about interruption from the trash truck that serves my community. Your dad is bringing your pup back, part of community. It's all stuff related to people. It's funny, man. But yeah, I think I'll be interested to listen to it back and see how we can piece it together. But yeah, it should be no problem at all. I don't believe any of the interruptions from our end.
took away from the weight and the beauty of what community is.
Nikki Humphrey (02:47)
And what just popped in that we did not address on our episode is being hurt by community.
Hope Mangiafico (02:58)
And that's a big pain point for a lot of people, especially that last point of where to find community, which was in the church. Yeah.
Nikki Humphrey (03:07)
I've been hurt by
community and it feels, I don't know if you've had the same experience, but it feels like such a betrayal. Like it feels like somebody has ripped your heart out and stomped on it.
Hope Mangiafico (03:21)
Yeah.
Absolutely. ⁓ I can I could speak on that. You know what's interesting about it is people both ourselves and people around us do make really silly decisions. You know call them selfish or whatever you want to call it because I mean it's different at different times. ⁓ But one thing I do really love about the Lord through the we'll call it
trial of betrayal is the highlight and the goodness of it is when you take it to the Father and you take it to even if it's just like one trusted person, even if it's not a person close to you like a friend, but you go talk to like, like I talk about my biblical counselor, I don't work with her anymore, but I loved her so dearly and I knew she was safe to talk to you. You come out stronger.
Nikki Humphrey (04:18)
Mm-hmm.
Hope Mangiafico (04:23)
And it helps you be the community member that makes you the healthy person in the community. So you become like your declaration. Part of your declaration was like making you ready to be the community that you're desiring.
Nikki Humphrey (04:36)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Hope Mangiafico (04:39)
you will through that pain become what you want to attract in a community and have like the five people around you kind of thing all averaging to be loving and kind and burden bearing and celebratory. ⁓ But a lot of times all of those great things in life come with deep pain. Deep, deep pain. know, some people ask, Nikki, to your point about betrayal, like,
you know, why do bad things happen to good people? And like, why would God create evil? And yada, yada, yada. It's one of those things you can talk yourself into a hole and be like, well, crap, I didn't really give you an answer. Then there, done that, made a mistake. But like, I really can say, and I think you can too, that all of those things made me so much more aligned with my father and what he can do and wants to do in my life.
And I no longer ask that question, even though it hurts. But I'm like, I got enough history with you now, God, that I don't even need to know the answer to that question. Because you're coming with something better.
Nikki Humphrey (05:39)
Mm-hmm. Yes.
Hmm.
He really does. And he does it for your protection. And I know that seems cliche. And I know that if you're going through that right now, you're like, girl, zip it. But he really does. He really wants the best for you. And he really wants the best people around you. And now I look back on some of those communities, I've talked about this a couple of times, and I'm like, those weren't my people. And I was trying so hard to make it work.
And God's like, no, no, I have something so much better for you.
Hope Mangiafico (06:28)
Yeah. And to your point too, Nikki, of like they weren't your people, but at the same time, if we go back to like reason, season, lifetime thing, we have and they have, the other people have free will. And something that's really interesting is let's say you're listening and you actually are like us and you're like, dude, I know how to hear the Lord. I swear that that person was meant to be community for me.
You probably heard the Lord correctly. You probably listened correctly, but because of free will, that trajectory can change at any point in time. And I do not say that again to keep you on your toes or to make you afraid. I feel like I put that little tagline at the end of a lot of my statements, but I needed that encouragement when I felt like I knew that I knew that I knew that I heard God correctly about something. And then all of a sudden it's like what happened?
but God I heard this so I'm just gonna keep chasing this. And he's like no, no, no Hope, that's no longer your person, your place, whatever. They made a decision that unfortunately affects the next steps moving forward. Or Hope you made a decision, you put too much in that relationship.
Nikki Humphrey (07:42)
Right.
Hope Mangiafico (07:43)
betrayed because I put too much weight into the relationship. You know what I mean? Like, it's ⁓ it's complex but it's that beautiful part of like you're talking about, Holy Spirit, you're supposed to be my community. Like, Holy Spirit is your community. The Father is. Jesus is, like I said, in ⁓ the humor of God episode. Like, he's like your brother. Like, when in doubt and most pain, you do not have to have a formal prayer and go to him and ask him all these questions. Be like, you're my community. Help me understand.
and cleanse me in the process and set me free in Jesus name. ⁓
Nikki Humphrey (08:21)
I mean, my daughter and I say a simple prayer all the time together. know, God cut off any people who aren't supposed to be in our lives and bring us the people who are.
Simple as that. People aren't supposed to be in my life anymore, cut them off. Bring me to the people, lead me to the people who I should be in community with.
Hope Mangiafico (08:47)
Absolutely, absolutely. And like a short little add on to that is just like, and bless them on their way, you know? It's like, we learned it like bless and release kind of thing in network marketing, but you can do the same thing in personal relationships. It's like, I bless them or release them to wherever you want them to go, obviously. And I hated that. Honestly, I hated that statement in network marketing, because I had a scarcity mindset and you know,
Nikki Humphrey (08:55)
That's right.
Yes.
Right.
Hope Mangiafico (09:16)
as someone that's trying to sort through community, you may have a scarcity mindset because you feel alone and isolated and there's not enough people in the world for you to love you, right? And we gotta release that and truly bless and release, open your hands and let go of it.
Nikki Humphrey (09:24)
Mm-hmm.
Hope Mangiafico (09:38)
I'm so glad you do that with Josephine at such a young age.
Nikki Humphrey (09:42)
You already said it during this bonus episode. We think we should beat, so we try so hard to make it work. And sometimes we just need God to sever that connection for us.
Hope Mangiafico (09:57)
And he will, he will and it will not look like what it might have looked if you took the steps sooner.
Nikki Humphrey (09:58)
He will.
Yeah.
Hope Mangiafico (10:08)
Yeah, I got stories like that, man. I really do. And it's one of those things you're like, man, in the moment, like, God, why'd you do that? And then you just give him a couple months, you know, a little time, almost like a couple months, because then there's probably someone listening that was in the shoes that I once was in. Okay, two months. So God, I'm waiting. Give them some time and you will have more clarity. Not all answers, but clarity.
And that's how we can speak on it today. And I would like to also add that I would absolutely love that my best friend here would be a little closer to me. ⁓ There is a beauty of actual proximity geographically, but it's also a sweet reminder that if you do feel defeated because you don't feel like there's a lot near you, God will use.
Nikki Humphrey (10:51)
Thanks
Hope Mangiafico (11:07)
technology, the things I get poo-pooed on all the time because they can be used for good and bad, he will use it and still do something amazing in your life with community.
I mean you don't still long for the closeness geographically but you will still move.
So be open to it all, right? At the end of the day, Nikki, I think that's what it is, is like, be open.
Nikki Humphrey (11:37)
Go outside your home and be open.
Hope Mangiafico (11:43)
So gonna steal this from a guy that I used to work with at my own job. This is a statement he would make all the time and I'd like, stop saying that, drives me nuts, it's so simple. And here I am quoting him. ⁓ He would say, hope I'm just available.
That's all he would say
And as I'm saying, be open, it's the same thing. And it goes back to our main episode where you were speaking and I said something, I'm trying to remember going back to the episode, ⁓ that it all boils down to being present. When you're given your five places to find community, just be present. To be available is to be present. And watch God move, and that's what the enemy's after, is taking away our ability to be present with what's in front of us.
Nikki Humphrey (12:28)
Yes.
Hope Mangiafico (12:35)
Watch and see what God can do when you're present.
Nikki Humphrey (12:40)
Amen.
