Hope Mangiafico (00:00)
Hi, I'm Hope.
Nikki Humphrey (00:02)
Hi, I'm Nikki. Welcome to Equip Fellowship, where friends become family through Christ. We're two Jesus-loving friends on a mission to share personal stories, resources, and real talk about our triumphs, breakthroughs, struggles, and setbacks. Why? Because we believe you are called to live victoriously, and we're here to equip you with the Holy Spirit-led tools
strategies to strengthen your faith, transform your mindset and walk boldly in God's promises. Because here's the truth, you have been given great and precious promises by God. So grab your coffee, lean in and let's grow together. It's time to step into everything God has for you.
Hope Mangiafico (00:32)
.
You know, what's so funny is you had that little thing that said, hear, and it's really cool because we don't know how today is unfolding, but I have a statement about hearing. And so it's just as soon as you like had that little, we're here, and it's just that little stubble. I'm like, yeah, guy, we're gonna talk about hearing today. I just, felt that and I thought that was really cool.
Nikki Humphrey (01:04)
Yeah.
you as I had that hiccup too, I had this download that said because we are here God's gonna show up.
Hope Mangiafico (01:33)
Hmm
Nikki Humphrey (01:35)
So it doesn't matter. Like Hope and I are just the vessel today. Whatever God brings forth, He's gonna bring forth, because we are here, we showed up. And because we showed up, He is already here.
Hope Mangiafico (01:39)
Yeah.
Amen. Absolutely. And that's like God to use every form of a word, right? And to show up and that's I love that so much. And, know, I mentioned to you, Nikki, I guess it's not been probably two weeks ago about just like what was on my heart about this topic. And I actually think
What we're talking about today has transformed in my heart as life events have unfolded. So I'm excited to see what happens as we step into our role as the vessels and see what we hear from God and how he shows up. And you know, when we first started talking, my like summary, if you will, my little title for this is like, keep the main thing the main thing. And it just kept coming back to me without really even knowing what that meant other than like, he's the main thing, right? ⁓
But then today, like, when I took it to the Father for just a brief moment, today is all about our role in life is all that matters and then taking personal responsibility. So basically how we show up. What do we do in that alignment?
And it got really stirred up this morning because of some conversations I was having. And I'm like, God, this is what you've been putting on my heart for the past couple of weeks is that we tend to look outside of ourselves to either help people or to seek help. And also not just looking outside for help or trying to extend help by avoiding the stuff within, but further.
we point our fingers outside of ourselves instead of, you know that saying it's like you have a finger pointing to someone and three more pointing out to you? But instead of observing these three pointing back at you, you're just pointing to everyone else that everyone else is the problem. Instead of asking that question of what is your role, right? And how do you take personal responsibility? That is the main thing that God wants to do, right? It's a heart condition.
Nikki Humphrey (03:32)
Yeah.
Hope Mangiafico (03:54)
So that's kind of what he just showed up with this morning. And he highlighted that by doing this whole pointing fingers and not looking inward and trying to avoid your crap and also trying to help other people from a point of pain and brokenness, change doesn't happen when you do that. No change, change outwardly in the world or change inwardly. It's ineffective.
Nikki Humphrey (04:20)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Hope Mangiafico (04:22)
We're ineffective vessels and God really wants to address that today. And I don't want to say that from a condemning place because you and I are imperfect. He's using us. He will use it because he works all things for good. And if you're content being less than what he wants to use you for, then you don't have to listen. You can keep going through life. But if you do want the more,
and how to be fully aligned with who he's made you and who he is, I would encourage you to listen, to take that personal responsibility, and to keep the main thing the main thing and not lose sight of what really matters.
Nikki Humphrey (05:05)
Yeah.
I totally get that. My flow thought through my brain these last couple days is I have to uncouple with my worldly thoughts because my worldly thoughts always...
Distract me and I wanna I wanna help everybody and I want to do this and I want to do that and I want to be really spontaneous with with my actions or my thoughts, but when I uncouple with the world I have to continuously like we've been talking about time and time again. I have to check in with the father What is it that you want to tell me? What is it that you want me to do? Do I move do I stay do I? Not react like it's so easy it for example. I was at
church on Sunday and I usually want to go help everybody who seems to be struggling in the service and God was like, that, sit, girl, sit back down. Instead of girl get up, he's like, plant yourself.
Hope Mangiafico (05:57)
Yes!
There's a time for everything!
Nikki Humphrey (06:09)
Right, and it wasn't till the end of the service when God was like move
and I moved.
and that when I moved, it was felt ordained and it felt like a supernatural blessing on that. And you know what? The person that I moved towards probably would have missed what God wanted to do with that person in that moment if I would have moved in my worldly thing of helping all the people all around me and doing all the things. But when we uncouple with the world,
Hope Mangiafico (06:19)
.
Nikki Humphrey (06:47)
world
and just connect back to our father and when he says to sit down, when he says to stop it, even though other people might think that's the wrong choice, when he says sit, sit, when he says move, move, when he says go, go, when he says pull back, we have to pull back.
Hope Mangiafico (07:04)
Amen. It's funny you shared that story because my next little thing I just had as a note was change happens when we turn to God and we ask him the five questions which you learn in elementary school.
Who, what, when, where, and why? You go to him to get the details of the storyline that's playing out in that moment. Who do I talk to? When do I get up and talk to them? Why, why are you telling me to speak to them? Because then you might get a better picture, right? ⁓ Where? Like just all those details that, again, you learned this in like elementary school of understanding a full story. He is the author.
And we think, and I'm so bad at this, and I think, Nikki, you can relate to this too, that there is a teaching about being the hands and feet of Jesus. And then we run with that. Again, we've talked about it before, run without him. And he can use it. But the catch here, and this is where I'm like, I'm curious how you relate to this, Nikki. I was just telling this story this morning.
that God a couple years ago convicted me with a loving correction of hope. You want to help so many people, right? Especially at the time it was with their health, right? Their bodies, getting the healing. He's like, but you're still trying to help from a place of pain. And God's not pain. So then I'm not aligning with him because I'm helping from my brokenness. And we tend to build from
Nikki Humphrey (08:28)
Yeah. ⁓
Hope Mangiafico (08:37)
A broken is thinking, well, I didn't have this, so let me give it to the person or, you know, I can relate to that because maybe you're in it still and not even realizing it, so let me speak on it. But if he is not saying to move and you are ready, you're helping from a broken place that is not ready to steward outwardly that gift, that love and that power of his.
Does that make sense?
Nikki Humphrey (09:09)
It makes total sense. Another thing that happened yesterday, I met up with somebody for coffee and we were talking and this person was asking me just a lot of questions about my story and I was sharing and she was really wanting me to dive deep and I was. And then it came to a point where they were like, but I want to be able to do that. And I'm like.
Hope Mangiafico (09:30)
Mmm.
Nikki Humphrey (09:33)
I go, for me, I wasn't able to talk about this, to share this, to let other people know what happened in my life and to be radically honest about my story until I healed it with my father. Until I was being able to walk out my story, walk out what I've been through without any shame, any condemnation, any guilt, any judgment from others. When I...
Hope Mangiafico (09:53)
.
Nikki Humphrey (10:00)
sat down with my father and healed everything layer by layer like that, like the onion that we talk about and received the healing and the prompting and the why and the words. I was just sharing out of almost
wanting to be a victim before.
You know how we talked about like being a victim and I wanted to be honored for being a victim like, oh, Nikki, your story, your struggle, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, and sharing through a victim mindset. But now I can share my story. I'm like, look what God did. Look at how he showed up. Look at the transformational power that he did. Look at the good work he did in my life.
Hope Mangiafico (10:21)
Well, right, it's.
Nikki Humphrey (10:45)
And that is the complete difference. I told this person, I'm like, don't share your story just to share your story. Because that's for your glory. You want to be in a place with God that when you are sharing, He gets the glory.
Hope Mangiafico (11:01)
Yes, and and not sharing just cuz you know that you know, okay, he's gonna get something good out of this God's gonna show up but you share from a
conviction so deep within you because that conviction, Nikki, that you're saying you have now, that got cultivated. It was not created by you. And I think we tried our move out of self-created thoughts instead of the conviction and the healing and the cultivation by God. You could never have cultivated that victory mindset on your own. You had to take that personal, radical responsibility
Nikki Humphrey (11:22)
Yes.
Hope Mangiafico (11:37)
and recognize your role is to heal yourself, not to blame the people that hurt you. And I had this conversation this morning with someone about, and I know I've already referenced that a couple of times, but with what you just shared, the person said, it's so hard for me not to take this stuff personally, because they're so close to me. And I said, do you know what? I have a tendency when we're having repetitive conversations to say, I'm you off right here, because let me tell you something, and they know it's from love.
The details actually don't matter because you can't just not take something personally because you don't really know if it's actually personal or not. But what you can do is keep growing in your identity in Christ and you so deeply rooted in who you are in him and letting him heal that that you won't take it personally because you know who you are. And then he gets all the glory. And then from your overflow, you are helping other people. So the people that you feel like are coming at you.
which they probably are, because they're also trying to help from a broken place and they can't hear, they can't see well in those moments because it's the victimhood, it's the pain that's coming out. But if you do your role and take that personal responsibility, your overflow will bless them just like you, Nikki, being able to speak to someone asking about your story and they want it, well now you've got overflow because you let him in and your overflow can tell.
them the truth of how you got there and it blessed them. You didn't give them answers necessarily. You told them the living truth and that overflow did something for them. But you could only do that by taking that personal responsibility and no longer pointing fingers outward because that's what victim mindset is, right? It's everyone else against me.
Nikki Humphrey (13:28)
And when you're in the victim mindset, you love to play in the circle of dysfunction. You love to jump in with both feet and you love to try to like, not battle it out like in it, but you have this like dysfunctional cycle that you always get caught up in. you don't have to be, you don't have to say, I'm stepping out of your cycle of dysfunction. You just step away. And when you step out of that cycle of dysfunction,
Hope Mangiafico (13:45)
Yes.
Nikki Humphrey (13:58)
Like you were saying, Hope, it not only changes the person to lock in with their identity with Christ, like, I'm going to take a break, I'm going to take a minute, I'm going to step out of this cycle, I'm going to go to the Father. It also, that person you're in, that dysfunctional relationship, it causes them to pause and be like, wait a minute, something's different here. We usually go tit for tat or around and round or are always up against each other, but they just stepped away. So that in turn, by byproduct,
Hope Mangiafico (14:20)
Mm.
Nikki Humphrey (14:29)
causes the other person to be like, what's up and get curious about what's going on with the other person.
Hope Mangiafico (14:36)
It's that power of the pause. If it ain't happened naturally, because you're not there, you or the other person's not there, mature enough to do the pause, the pause will be forced. ⁓
Nikki Humphrey (14:45)
Right, and then I was talking to a client yesterday and I was just like, when somebody's all amped up and in that posture, they wanna go at it with you, if you just excuse yourself,
Hope Mangiafico (14:58)
Mm. Yeah.
Nikki Humphrey (14:58)
the person can't stand there or be on the phone and just go through those motions themselves. So it automatically gets a full timeout for everybody in the situation, like you just said.
Hope Mangiafico (15:10)
Yes. And, you know, no matter what your beliefs are in regards to like the spiritual world of things, something I was talking to my husband about this weekend, because, you know, just you are always going to be around people. And that's part of the beauty and the hardship
to him about anxiety because, you know, there's a lot of anxious people in the world and ⁓ I tend to attract those and I've been working with the Lord of like, okay, so what is my role here? Because at some place I know that I attracted it because I was trying to play God. So that wasn't actually he's going to use it. But I wasn't listening to him in those moments necessarily because I was still whatever, right, caught up in my own yuck. But
I told Sean that such a breakthrough happened when the person that was really anxious, who I loved and cared about dearly, and I portrayed this to this person, they understood it. I no longer could be that rescuer in the anxiety because I was actually comforting the anxiety, not the person, because a person is not the anxiety. That's a separate, whatever you want to call it, be it an entity, a
⁓ just a feeling altogether, even if you just view it as an emotion, they are not anxiety that's not their identity. So you put on your glasses of seeing them as a child of God that they are. I can't play with the anxiety because all I'm doing is comforting it for it to keep coming back while the person still over here needing help. So I pulled away like you're saying, Nikki, and I don't ignore it, but I address it now very differently without rescuing.
but rather reminding them of who they are, what God says, right? And it's literally, I am not in the picture anymore. I redirect to the only one that can help and I can speak from experience, which I'm doing a lot better with personally, of simply sharing my experience. To your point, you could share it once you understood who gets the glory, who showed up. Your story carries crazy weight.
when you're able to share that experience for His glory.
and keep the coddling out of the way for the yuck.
Nikki Humphrey (17:33)
Right, because when we step in and we do that, we're enabling the person. And when you enable a person, however you do it, financially, emotionally, spiritually enabled, whatever it is, you halt their healing process because you're not giving them a tool. Like you just said, you're coddling them. You're just trying to make them feel comfortable. And when you're dealing with those things, it's not comfortable. That's why we need to turn to our father.
Hope Mangiafico (17:36)
Correct.
Yes.
Yes. You want them to be uncomfortable, actually, right? That's gonna be...
Nikki Humphrey (18:06)
Right, because that's where change happens. Nobody's
going to change when they're comfortable. I've made my biggest life changes when I'm hitting rock bottom, when I'm just on the ground, flat out, like I don't know where to turn. And then I turn to God.
Hope Mangiafico (18:24)
Yeah. That's so good. you know, turning to God reminds me of last week, I think it was last week, we were reading about Solomon and I had this like light bulb moment and it felt appropriate for the day and you just fed into it so well.
That Solomon, right? He wasn't necessarily at rock bottom because his amazing father David sure did do a lot of warring and lot of yawc and sin, all the things. But he went to God and he asked for wisdom, right? And now on the other end of the story, we know him as the wisest man that like ever lived. But what was so interesting to me was in my Bible, and you have a study Bible, so yours probably elaborated even more.
Nikki Humphrey (19:00)
Mm-hmm.
Hope Mangiafico (19:15)
but it had like the Hebrew translation of wisdom is hearing. So he was asking to hear God so that he would do the right judgments, make the right decisions. And he asked to hear God well, and he wasn't asking for wealth or for longevity. It was simply to hear God. And I thought that was so cool. But then that led me to be like, okay, cool.
Nikki Humphrey (19:38)
Mm-hmm.
Hope Mangiafico (19:44)
we hit rock bottom, we're like, God, I need you, I gotta turn to you, so you're asking for his wisdom, you're asking to hear from him. And then we have to listen. And in today's world, the listening is the problem. Because once you turn to God and ask questions, just like you're talking about at rock bottom, now what are you going to do to listen while there's noise in the world? We have...
noise from social media postings. There's so much political stuff going on and that's what kind of stirred this originally in me is like all sides of the playing field are in it instead of coming out and saying what is my role, God? Who do I talk to? Because at the end of the day, you make the greatest ⁓ impact on individuals just like you meeting with the friend and just like me having one on conversations. That's where the impact is. So
Where do you, in all of that, how do you pull away and mute the social media postings and the politics and even pointing the fingers and taking it personally and thinking they're the problem? Are you asking for the wisdom and then are you listening after that?
Because I have seen people, Nikki, hit the rock bottom you're talking about and they're desperate. And maybe they say a prayer.
But that's it. They don't listen. That pausing. They'll pause to ask for the hearing. But they don't continue that role. And I mean, again, I shouldn't even say they. I need to speak from personal stories. But my conviction's been so heavy for the world on this topic. Because I'm seeing people that historically were really good listeners to God.
No longer. I'm like, what are you, why are you getting in the noise?
The main thing, you've lost sight of the main thing.
That's heartbreaking to me ⁓ because, know, Nikki, our greatest responsibility as individuals is to do exactly like you said. You get to your rock bottom, you ask God, you turn to God, you listen, and then you go to the next person that you can help. And that's what making disciples is all about. That's what it shows in the scriptures. And we have that knowledge.
but we don't act it out because we get stuck in the noise.
And the enemy knows. Again, a roaring lion that keeps coming back up in ways that I would never have dreamt, honestly. But he's annoying. He's constant.
How are you gonna listen to God?
Nikki Humphrey (22:31)
For me, I see like there's noise everywhere. Like you said, everywhere we turn, there's noise. But going back to what you said this title was, keeping the main thing the main thing.
I can't focus on other people's noise. I can't let it affect me. I have to focus keeping the main thing, the main thing is my relationship with God, Jesus, Holy Spirit, getting myself in the Word, journaling.
Hope Mangiafico (22:48)
Yes.
Nikki Humphrey (23:04)
doing all the things that I have to and then I am equipped, I am armored up, like we said in a previous episode, to go out into the world and just love people well. You know, around where I live, like there's very strict lines of like what people believe and what they're going through. I tried, I just cut out all the noise.
Hope Mangiafico (23:21)
Yeah.
Nikki Humphrey (23:27)
And I just go up and love those people well, even if they knew that I love Jesus, even if they knew what I align myself with. They would probably hate me, but I don't need to put who I am on there. I don't need to go like, I am a child of God. I am this, I am that. I just need to stay plugged in with my father and love that person well and just see what happens. Just be a vessel. I don't need to...
put a mirror on them and be like, look, do you see what you're doing? Like, no, but I.
Hope Mangiafico (24:01)
Or
or or share that you finally realized the truth, but maybe they have it and so you're you're This isn't even real confidence. I feel like when you wear a shirt It's okay to wear if you're someone that likes apparel, but you do need to think about what is this conveying to a broken world and And the world is so broken and we see that with all that noise and then we get
caught up in it and want to help. But if you try and help from a place that can come across misunderstanding or they've been hurt, to your, I just think you're so right. Like you don't, you don't, oddly enough, I think that comes back to who you are if you are trying to convey anything about you, because then it's back looking at again, the navel gazing. Now you're looking inward instead of upward.
Nikki Humphrey (24:50)
That's
right. And even if like, yes, last night at a swim meet, this person had the shirt on that I would not necessarily agree. But I went up to this person and I hugged him. like, how you doing? How the kids doing in the meet? What are you excited about? Like what's going on? And it's just like, I want to connect person to person. I don't want to be disconnected just because somebody has a shirt on that I disagree. Look who Jesus connected with, all the broken people. So I want to keep my judgment.
Hope Mangiafico (25:14)
You
Nikki Humphrey (25:20)
banner off and just connect with them person to person, heart to heart, so they can see my heart posture. So when our relationship or if our relationship grows, I can plant
more seeds, but it's gotta start with the heart. It's gotta start with the relationship and judgment just has to stay in the background.
Hope Mangiafico (25:46)
Right, and we know that, again, if we don't even talk about an enemy, that we talk about God, God is not, how do I say this? I don't want to say he's not divisive because clearly that religion has created so much in the world, but he,
would not be labeling someone the way we tend to label. ⁓ Also the whole like world is created around ⁓ bipartisan is not the world. The two, like black and white basically, right? You got the left and the right, this and that, that and this. And there's only two sides it seems to everything. And I wanna encourage to Nikki's point.
whether it's someone's shirt that you don't agree with, so it's agreement or disagreement, ⁓ I would encourage you to just get rid of the either or mindset. God lives in the in-between. So whether that's political sides, that's apparel, that's ⁓ choices, he's in the in-between. And that's where we need to live with him so he can use us.
for his glory in the world and actually create the impact because we all know if we pause and think about it, our lives were changed by an individual taking the time to spend with us. Not by... You might have an impact from a social media post, but God probably opened a door for you to have a conversation with someone that then led you back to, yeah, I read something that was similar to that and it brings it all together.
For everyone listening, this is to Nikki and I as well, you're such an important vessel that God wants to use to impact the world. And I dare to say change the world. And you may show up for a protest, whatever, but you better stop and think about the who, what, when, where, why, asking God the questions of why you're doing what you're doing and aligning with Him so He can
have that impact through you.
Nikki Humphrey (28:01)
Mm-hmm.
Hope Mangiafico (28:03)
He's in the in-between.
The enemy is the one that likes to just have sides all the time.
Nikki Humphrey (28:08)
Hmm?
Hope Mangiafico (28:11)
God isn't like that.
It's literally, I don't know if I've really ever thought about this, but for every listener, which most listeners are followers of Christ, but if they happen to share this with somebody, every listener and every human being on the face of the earth, it is us with Jesus and God against one enemy. And I think we need to be reminded of that.
God is on your side even if you aren't choosing him right now through Christ. He does not despise an individual for their choices. There is one enemy that has misled all of us to make the decisions we make, the beliefs that we have. One enemy and that is the one pursuit God has of wanting to say no more. Remember that we're all on the same team.
even if we are not in alignment and agreement right now. And it looks like we're on this one side versus another.
It's a lie.
Nikki Humphrey (29:17)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
I wrote a note and it said, God never asked you to save anyone. He just asked you to be a witness. ⁓ 1 8 says, you will receive the power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you and you will be my witness. The word witness means.
Hope Mangiafico (29:28)
Mmm.
Nikki Humphrey (29:40)
You just share what you've seen and know to be true. If Jesus says that's something in your life, you already have everything you need to begin. So we're not, we're just called to be a witness. That's it. Simple, not easy. Like we always say, it's simple, not easy. But we don't have to convince anybody. We just have to live out our life.
Hope Mangiafico (29:44)
Mmm.
And that's so simp-
And you know, makes me think about Paul. We are so familiar with all the New Testament that Paul wrote, but he so often wrote in his verses, I guess as like a reminder to everyone too, that he is just sharing what he learned and what God did through him and through him because at the end of the day, he often was like, I'm the greatest sinner of all sinners, right? Like if anyone could be like, you know, pointed fingers out and disappointed, it's me.
Nikki Humphrey (30:32)
Yeah.
Hope Mangiafico (30:33)
So he's just witnessing of, you know, telling people like, it ain't my works. It's all him. And it's crazy to think about that because Paul was such a teacher. But if you really think about it, he only taught from his experiences through Holy Spirit.
Man.
That's good.
So you know what I think?
the end of the day opens up the opportunity to being a witness as letting God in to refine you.
And what is really neat is I came across an Instagram post this week and it was pulling from Malachi 3.3 and it says, as in God will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver. He will purify the Levites and refine them like gold and silver. And this seems to compliment what you were just saying and then me talking about Paul because Paul really was
doing so many great things, witnessing so well, but he had been refined and purified like none of us can understand. And what's really cool about Malachi 3.3 is ⁓ someone that is a silversmith holds the silver right in the middle of the heat of the fire. And they have to actually, so let's say it's God holding you in the middle of a fire, not only
Will he only keep you there until it's done and he knows it's done once all the impurities fall off and his reflection is seen? Which is really cool. But on top of that, he's right there in the heat with you. That was like my takeaway of this thought of like a silversmith is that is really painful to be in the middle and you have to stay until his reflection is seen in you.
Nikki Humphrey (32:23)
Mm-hmm.
Hope Mangiafico (32:36)
He's not far from that fire, which means he knows exactly when it's time to take you out. He knows when you're ready and purified to be able to witness with a pure heart.
Nikki Humphrey (32:44)
Mm-hmm.
Hope Mangiafico (32:52)
with that no victim mindset, with that look at me, I'm his, look at me, because in me now, you should see the reflection of him, not look at me because look at my hurt, or look at me, look how much God's done in a boastful way, but look at me, I'm changed, and they only see him. And he's like my child.
I was so close by your side in that fire. I mean, that's how Paul made it through all that. Getting bit by a snake, being shipwrecked, being in prison. He was being refined, staying strong, and God was right there.
and then he continued to have the ability to witness.
And so that's the key. starts with you and being willing to step into a refiner's fire and say, I can't do anything or help anyone until I let you help me, God.
And that's the main thing, which is what you said earlier. It's like, okay, Hope, we're revisiting, keeping the main thing the main thing. The main thing is my relationship with him and with Jesus and Holy Spirit.
Nikki Humphrey (34:05)
Mm-hmm.
It's almost as you said that again and I'm like main thing the main thing and I had this vision and it's almost like a vision of an action movie. Like God wants to walk out his glory on earth. So no matter all the chaos, if we imagine just all the chaos, all this darkness, all this fighting, all this, know, worldly things, issues around us, let that go. Be a vessel, be that bright light.
in the midst of all the worldly chaos and just be that witness for Him. So often, like I tell my clients, we want to pick up everybody else's stuff. We got this and I got this from her and I got this and I got a little bit of this and I want to help this person. It's like if we are carrying around everybody else's stuff and trying to help everybody else, our hands are full. We can't even help ourselves and we block that connection to God because we have too much stuff.
That God's like you got this too much chaos in your life for you to even hear me right now So I'm here, but you're not gonna hear me right now
Hope Mangiafico (35:16)
Yeah. And he's so loving that he will still speak to you about how to help those people.
but it will be limited. Because I'm thinking, right, right. And that's what's.
Nikki Humphrey (35:27)
Maybe you're not even supposed to help those people. That's the whole thing.
Like we just think like, ⁓ people to help. Like you told me, sit down girl. You're not helping those five people today.
Hope Mangiafico (35:35)
No, but you're- you're right, but-
No,
you're exactly right, but that's what's so crazy about God is like you're not supposed to be and you can be a hindrance, but somehow through the amazing power and wondrous works of God, he's still somehow gonna use you to help. And I wanna emphasize that because while I do absolutely agree with what Nikki's saying and I would hope that you get to the point where you only help where it's gonna be the most effective, he is so good.
that he will still help those people, but just know that it could be even better. And that's the catch is better for them. And ultimately, I would dare to say what's important to him is even better for you.
And it goes back to one of the greatest commandments, love your neighbor as yourself.
You gotta drop the things so you take care of you and then you can pick up the stuff and quickly release it and then you're back on yourself. We like to keep our hands full and if he says to put it down we still fight back of putting it down. Or push back I guess is the right term but I don't know I like I always want to emphasize that character of God because I don't understand it but like
So many times I've tried to help people and I wasn't supposed to or I overstepped what I was supposed to do. But because I kept the main thing the main thing I received the loving correction and I continued to try and walk out. Well, God, I'm still holding this and I'm trying to let it go, but it's really hard. It's like finger by finger by finger. And while he's doing that, he's working on them, which we've talked about this before, and he's somehow by his wonderful love.
has myself and the other person benefit. So it's important to remember that, but just also knowing that you can be more effective, more impactful, and you can feel at peace and joy and wholeness while doing it in a way that you've probably, I feel very confident in saying this, you've probably never experienced before. Because we all have those layers that we still need to work through.
Nikki Humphrey (37:34)
Mm-hmm, that's right.
Hope Mangiafico (38:02)
It's like bunches of onions, Nikki. We're not just one onion.
⁓ But you're so right. It's a really good image of just holding everything. And I love that everything you're holding ended up blocking your face too. All of the sensory that's up here.
Nikki Humphrey (38:20)
But because the enemy always wants us to look down. He wants our gaze down. He wants our focus to be down. He doesn't want us to look up to God. He doesn't want us looking above what's right in front of us. And that's what we got to do. We got to remember, look up, keep looking up. The enemy wants you to look down. You got to look up in every situation.
Hope Mangiafico (38:45)
Yeah.
And if you're, if you're having trouble, go listen to episode four, girl, get up because it is all about your gaze and getting up. And he's trying to encourage you right now. If you're, if you're struggling, he wants to encourage you of girl, get up. I'm here. I'm raising you up.
And we have to remember that he's continuously raising us up.
Nikki Humphrey (39:12)
And the enemy wants us to distract us. And the enemy wants us to take care of everybody else and to spread us thin and to make us weak. And so when we're focused on everybody else, we can't focus on God. That becomes like, ⁓ you hear people too busy. Well, I'm too busy to do that. I'm too busy to read my Bible. I'm too busy to journal. I'm too busy to go to church. Right, because you are focused on all these other things and...
Hope Mangiafico (39:16)
yeah.
Nikki Humphrey (39:41)
Maybe you're not supposed to be focusing on every single one of those things.
Hope Mangiafico (39:45)
Right. Exactly.
Nikki Humphrey (39:49)
It's not a lack of time, it's a lack of how you steward it.
Hope Mangiafico (39:53)
Right. And knowing and believing with that conviction, believing in the depths of who you are, that when you prioritize and steward your relationship with him above a social media post that you need to post or whatever or you feel like you need to post, ⁓ he will show up.
He's a redeemer. He will blow you away. I mean, truly, I have so many personal testimonies of that. But you do have to start building that history we've talked about so many times. And Nikki, your necklace keeps standing out to me for a couple different reasons. like, I wish I spoke up earlier, but it was such a good conversation.
But I think your necklace highlights two things to me. It's a star, obviously you know that, but like what's standing out is there's one that's just sticking out really drastically. ⁓ So two things about that. One, we want to be that one that's sticking out. That doesn't mean being loud. It doesn't mean broadcasting to the world different things, having the t-shirt, having the social media posts.
Nikki Humphrey (40:50)
me.
Hope Mangiafico (41:07)
The thing that makes you be the point that sticks out from the rest of everything else is keeping that main thing the main thing. And it makes you bigger. It makes you stronger. It makes you also, and I say this, I hope it makes sense to people, it makes you more attractive to come to because you're that reflection. So that's the first thing. The second thing that's highlighted to me on that is that when so protruded out,
that it's outside of the noise.
Be the part in your circle and your community. I mean, I pray for each person that they have community they can turn to that will bless them and pour into them. But even in that moment, make it your goal to be the one to step out and continue to grow deeper. Stand out.
and those people that are around you, even if they're awesome, you can continue to be like, man, what they have is great. I want that too, God. And you can continue to get bigger and to stand out more because we want to reflect him. And we, again, I think I've said this before, we don't necessarily arrive because we don't know what arrival is. So let that point be the point. You just go deeper and bigger.
and stand out and be the star he created you to be.
Nikki Humphrey (42:36)
What's also interesting about this necklace, and I also like about going deep, if we don't go in, once Hope and I deepened our relationship with God, that's when things started to move in our lives. So if you don't go deep with God, it just stays surface level, and it's hard to get your healing. But the reason why I got this necklace is because it's actually a lock. And so it locks into a star.
Hope Mangiafico (43:00)
Mmm.
Nikki Humphrey (43:03)
and it reminds me to lock into God's light. And once I'm locked into God's light, then I can be a light for others.
Hope Mangiafico (43:11)
⁓ amen. So man, that necklace has a lot of weight on it. Probably is heavy, it looks heavy, that too.
Nikki Humphrey (43:19)
We got some weight, yes.
Hope Mangiafico (43:22)
That's so cool. So yeah, it's like locking into him and the way it's even angled, it like the lock goes straight into that point that's bigger too, which I just, that point is what really sticks out to me. And of course you add that extra tidbit. It's like, man, that's even more powerful. So that's wonderful. Be the light. And you know, by doing that, this leads me into
I don't know if you have anything else you want to share, but it makes me think about being the love to the world that the world really needs. We think people need love and they do and we're right about that, but we often offer an incomplete love because we're not locked in to Him to be the light to the world. And there is a pure love that we can offer ⁓ and that's by continuously opening ourself and going deep into the love of Christ. So I wanted to, Nikki, if you have anything else to share, please do, but...
if we're gonna close soon, there's just a scripture I wanted to end with.
Nikki Humphrey (44:25)
Yeah, let's go into the scripture.
Hope Mangiafico (44:27)
Okay,
perfect. Now this might sound familiar to you, Nikki, because it was part of our reading yesterday. So it's Ephesians 16 through 21. Parts of the people are very familiar with. But it's all about his love. And it's our duty to extend that to the world by letting him in. So this is Paul also speaking to the Ephesians, but we are speaking it over you right now.
That He would grant you according to the riches of His glory to be strengthened with might by His Spirit in the inner man. That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith. That you being rooted and grounded in love may be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, the length, and depth, and height, and to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge. That you might be filled with all the fullness of God.
Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think according to the power that works in us, unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen.
Nikki Humphrey (45:40)
That's the exact one that was highlighted to me and I made notes from. That's why I grabbed my little book to read along what I wrote about that.
Hope Mangiafico (45:51)
That's awesome. Do you have a little nugget to share with it?
Nikki Humphrey (45:53)
I wrote really small, so let me put these on. Okay.
Okay. God's love is wide. It covers the breadth of our own existence and it reaches out to the whole world. God's love is long. It extends throughout our lives into eternity. God's love is high. It raises to the heights of our celebration and elation. God's love is deep.
Hope Mangiafico (46:06)
Mmm.
Nikki Humphrey (46:22)
It reaches the depths of our discouragement, despair, and even death when you feel shut out or isolated. Remember, you can never be lost to God's love.
Hope Mangiafico (46:35)
That'll do it. That's the main thing.
Nikki Humphrey (46:38)
Yes.
That will do it.
Hope Mangiafico (46:42)
Don't lose sight of that, my friends. And I'm preaching to myself.
Mm-hmm. ⁓ that's so cool.
Nikki Humphrey (46:51)
So thank you all for joining us today. If you know somebody in your life that struggles with keeping the main thing the main thing, or would love to hear this word of encouragement of how to stay focused on God in a world that's full of distractions, please send this to them. Reach out and if you have any revelation that came from you listening or watching this podcast, please let us know. We'd love to hear from you.
Hope Mangiafico (47:18)
Absolutely. Take care. Until next time.
